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[Video] Waking Up Alone

[Garrus appears on screen, running a hand through his hair. He didn't seem sad, or shaken, or depressed, or at least he was trying not to. He was just looking for the right way to say this. Not for his sake, but for the kids. Sugar coating things was something he was never good at, so eventually, he just settled on saying it.]

Shepard's gone, and ... I don't think it's another data-stream. Don't ask me how I know, but something in my gut tells me she's back home.

[He sighs, again fishing for words. He'd been doing that a lot recently, thinking about it.]

I can't exactly speak for her, but, ah ... I'm sure she'd say she's sorry for just up and disappearing. And that if she could have, she would have said goodbye.

[There's a little loneliness in his eyes for a moment, as he offers a reassuring smile aimed at the kids.]

I'm not much of a substitute, but if anyone needs to talk, or, ... or anything, I'll be around.

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[...

Shepard's gone.

Commander Shepard is gone.

Marley sits in her room for the longest time, just staring out her screen, not knowing how to react.

She's gone. She's just...gone...

When she finally manages to speak, tears are streaming down her cheeks.]

Sh-She...She's not...Please tell me she's just--Please?

[Crap. This is exactly what he was hoping to avoid. Even on his best day, he wasn't half as good at this as Shepard is, but he can't just sit back and let Marley cry her eyes out.]

I wish I could, but ... I'm sorry, but she's gone home. I know how hard this is, believe me I do ... But at least we know she's safe. She's alive, and she's home. That has to count for something, right?

[Marley gives a little whimper before ducking out of sight of her D-Terminal. A couple of choked sobs can be made out before she appears again, shaking her head slowly while trying to wipe her eyes.]

She said...She said she was staying. After the data stream--She said she would stay...

[Garrus feels a knot forming in his throat.]

And she meant it. But sometimes things happen, things you have no control over ...

[He looks a million miles away, lost in a memory of fire and death for a moment before he manages to pull himself out of it.]

She would have stayed if she could. She thinks of you like her kids, she'd do anything for you guys.

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...C...C-Comander Shepard too...?

[Garrus nods to the unfamiliar girl on the screen.]

Yeah ... someone else you know left recently?

...There have been...a few people...

Ah ... I'm, ah, I'm sorry to hear that.

[So Shepard wasn't the first.]

I don't think I got your name. I'm Garrus.

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[Cam's...

Is devastated strong enough? She's one of the only people who knows about him. She was the first one to tell him it was okay for him to be this way, that he's not messed up or psycho or a nutjob, that he's still worth something and truly tell him there was a reason for him feeling this way.

He'd started thinking of her as a mom.

(Mom. He misses his mom. He misses Commander Shepard. He misses, he misses...)

His voice wavers. He's not crying.]

She can't be.

I don't want to believe it either. [Garrus shakes his head. He wants her back here, with them, with him. But she isn't, and there's nothing he can do about it. As much as he wishes there was.]

I'm sorry, Cam.

[At least she's home, he almost says, but Cam saw that battle footage, he knows home for her isn't exactly peaceful, and he knows she wanted to stay here until everything was safe, until he was...

He doesn't mean to, but he sounds a little bitter, at the timing of it all.] I'm sorry you're stuck here instead of being with her.

[It's not all bad. And if anyone can get through the bad parts, it would be Shepard.]

I'm not sorry. Maybe I do wish I could go home, but I can't exactly leave you guys here in good conscience. Especially not when there's still a job to do. [He manages a smile. Weak? Maybe. But it was genuine.]

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...

[How does one...really react to this? Garrus and Wheeljack are scarily alike. And he knows the normal way ('Sorry for your loss') just doesn't cut it.]

How you holdin' up.

[Not like he cares.]

[Right.

[Garrus sighs, and shakes his head before looking back up. He was never good at this whole "feelings" thing, so hell if he knows.]

As well as I could be, I guess? I don't know ... it hurts, but ... at least she's home. At least she's with everyone else, and safe. Or as safe as she ever can be. Always getting in to the middle of something or other ... And they need her more than I do. With what's coming.

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...Yeah. There's that. It's not like she's gone...you know, forever.

Just until ya meet again.

[That was so dumb to say, Wheeljack. He even covers his face to hide that personal secondhand embarrassment to himself.]

Just...keep thinkin' that.

[No, no, he's right, after all.]

I know. It helps too look at it that way ... I just wish she was here, or I was there, or something.

... I don't like the idea of her fighting the Reapers when I'm not there. I know that she can fight them, hell, she might even win, but I still don't like it.

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Oh. [It's not really on the same level as Cam or Marley, and Maya seems more concerned about Garrus.] Are you - [Maya stops.] She's. She'll be okay, back home. Right?

Home's not exactly the safest of places sometimes, but she's died once, and all it did was piss her off, so I can't imagine she's going to have too hard of a time.

[That's bullshit. With the Reapers coming, nothing is certain, not his life, not hers, not anyone's. But this is Shepard we're talking about. If there's anyone who can find a way through, it's her.]

[Maya nods.]

I hope so.

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[...oh.]

I didn't even know that was possible.

Apparently it is. [Garrus shrugs halfheartedly. He's clearly trying not to show how much of a punch in the gut this is.] Hell of a way to find out.

[That's absolutely terrifying, Arcee doesn't even know what she'd do if her team up and vanished like that. She hated being alone here, she's not sure she'd be able to do it again.]

And her partner? He's just gone too?

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[First that memory, now this? This place must have it out for you or something Garrus.]

Are you...going to be okay?

[Well, that's par for the course.]

Yeah. Yeah I think so.

[He's more quiet than usual, more tired sounding. But he seems to believe that.]

[That's not making her feel better.]

I trust you, and I want to believe you, but with what happened before and now this- [Biting her tongue before she lets her own feelings get the better of her.] Just...know that you don't have to deal with this alone, okay?

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