Act 010 [video]

[yayashton]

[Ryan is sitting on a couch in what looks like an apartment. It's not, but you're not going to get him to admit that.]

I have a question for those of you in HospiTown. My former roommate, Ed, hasn't been responding to my messages. [Ryan looks unusually concerned.] Has . . . anyone seen him? He's . . . black hair that looks like a mess, terrible fashion sense, sometimes wears a really ugly brown cloak, kind of an idiot.

Nevermind. [Ryan visibly shifts out of the concern.] Regardless of whether or not Ed is still around, I do need your help with something else. I keep a record of events, as some of you might know, but it has become rather difficult to keep track of events now that we're all no longer in the same place. Tell me, what has happened in HospiTown?

Comments

[arrogantalloy]

That kind of sounds like you think things are actually worth writing about in this place, Bridget Jones.

[yayashton]

I just don't feel like explaining nine months worth of events to every new batch of people. It's a waste of time.

[arrogantalloy]

Well, you didn't explain anything to me, so. Already not so credible as a welcome wagon.

Not that I would have been all that. Interested.

Besides, people barely read what's on Wikipedia past the first paragraph. How are you even dispensing this nine months of In- have you've been here nine months? Or is this a hand me down thing?

[yayashton]

I'm not a welcome wagon, but sometimes I talk to newer people and it's faster to send them a document than try to explain everything that's happened. [Ryan rolls his eyes.] And yeah. I'm one of the first arrivals, we got here in summer and now it's winter. That's at least six months, but it's more like nine. The timeline only goes up to seven currently, though, because I haven't gone through my notes on December yet.

[Attachment: record of events]

[arrogantalloy]

[He downloads the attachment but doesn't look at it.]

Were you talking to someone about your anal retention before you came here at all?

[He scratches an an eyebrow for a moment then sighs.]

It's good though. That you're, uh, doing this, I guess. One of those look back to look forward things.

[yayashton]

It's a habit. [Unconcerned shrug.] I kept a diary back home, and I keep one here. It only makes sense to share what I know with other people.

[arrogantalloy]

I didn't even know people still kept non-work diaries when they got older than 11.

[As insulting as that sounds, it's more Tony just thinking out loud to himself.]

So really, what you're saying is you'd make a great Personal Assistant?

[yayashton]

It helps keep the plot straight. [What a weird statement.] And I wouldn't know. I only work when necessary.

[Meaning "I only had a job here because I needed the money, but now I've got all of San Francisco's resources at my disposal so fuck that noise."]

[arrogantalloy]

Apart from the whole diary thing, seems like we have something in common then.

[Tony's never actually considered anything he's done 'working' in his whole life.]

[yayashton]

I'm going to assume that's "being rich," since you so subtly inquired about me becoming your personal assistant.

[arrogantalloy]

I'm occasionally rich, and it wasn't so much as a subtly enquiry so much as a suggestion if you weren't sure what you wanted to be when you get home and grow up.

Besides, I don't think you could keep up with me. The shoes you'd have to fill were very efficient, small and expensively heeled.

[yayashton]

I'm an actor. [Not "I will be."] And your assistant's shoes, were they Jimmy Choo? My sister is fond them them.

[arrogantalloy]

Yeah, last time I met an actor we didn't see eye to eye.

[But he smirks anyway.]

A few of them were, I think. With the red, right? On the heel?

[Tony knows what looks good on a person, he doesn't know who made it.]

[yayashton]

Ah, Louboutins. Also an excellent choice. [He smiles.] She has good taste, I can see why it would be hard to replace her.

[arrogantalloy]

It was more than just her taste that had her on the pay roll.

Not that she's in the position any more.

[yayashton]

I figured, but shoes say a lot about a person and I suspect that to keep up with you she had to be fairly no-nonsense so the shoes aren't a status symbol. They're just because she's worth it. [Ryan shrugs.] I assume you promoted her.

[arrogantalloy]

I made her my C.E.O. So yeah, kind of the ultimate promotion. But you're right about the no nonsense.

[There's a pause that's almost fond.]

And she is certainly worth it.

[yayashton]

She sounds like a fantastic woman. I'm not sure why she put up with you, but that's not any of my business.

[arrogantalloy]

I ask that every day. But yeah, she really is. It's kind of why I pay her so much.