Mission 3: Ghosts of the Past

[hellspawnedhero]

*When the video opens, it shows Dante lying face down in bed, looking uncharacteristically tired. What can be seen of him is completely bare, though anything objectionable is fortunately either off screen or obscured by his position.*

Hey, any of you guys got advice for dealing with an upset sto-

*And that's when the deliberate post cuts off, overshadowed by a strange scene from nowhere in the known digital world.

Elsewhere, various TVs are showing another scene at seemingly random times.*

Comments

[badluckbabe]

Please tell me you two idiots don't do that every time you meet?

[hellspawnedhero]

We don't. Not any more.

*Oddly bitter tone for what should be good news...*

[badluckbabe]

Well, if nothing else this proves that we would be ALOT more effective with our powers. You were...almost unkillable there.

...

And what the hell is on my TV? What are you...who's that guy?

...oh, now he's a moth. Of course he is.

[hellspawnedhero]

All part of the half demon package. We can take a hell of a lot of punishment before we slow down.

...Moth? Big ugly guy with a dumb monocle, turned into a giant bug with an even dumber halo?

[badluckbabe]

Yeah, and boy were you hamming it up.

[hellspawnedhero]

Hey, they gave me an honest to goodness stage. What else was I supposed to do?

[badluckbabe]

Just...explain whatever that was? All of it? It's going to bug me if you don't.

[hellspawnedhero]

...That's got a lot of backstory, babe. The guy was part of a dumbass religious order that was worshippin' my old man. Humans treating a demon like a god, pretty damn stupid, huh? But him and a few other dumbasses had gone off the deep end and turned 'emselves into artificial half demons and gotten their hands on my brother's sword to boot. I happened to disapprove of a family heirloom sitting in the hands of a bunch of nutbars.

[badluckbabe]

...I've heard stranger.

Alright so I'm guessing in the end there wasn't enough of them left to drive in the carpool lane?

[hellspawnedhero]

The only guy with demonic power I left standin' was the one who got it the all natural way.

[badluckbabe]

Fair enough.

So what about your brother. Why do you two fight?

[hellspawnedhero]

*And again he looks away from the camera.*

We had...different ideas about some really important stuff. We're twins, so we've got the exact same half demon heritage, but he'd decided he didn't wanna be human. He'd also gotten it into his head that the only important thing is power and didn't give a crap who he hurt while trying to get it.

That place you saw us fighting on? That was a tunnel to hell he was working on openin' up.

[badluckbabe]

Does it ever occur to you how strange your life sounds?

[hellspawnedhero]

Babe...I'm the half demon son of a guy right outta the supernatural history books who hunts demons for a living and had something pretty damn close to a genuine evil twin. Strange doesn't cover the half of it.

[badluckbabe]

And now because of seemingly random circumstances you're completely human living in a world of monsters made of data.

[hellspawnedhero]

And the only surprise there is that I'm dealin' with tech instead of straight up magic.

[badluckbabe]

Well thanks for the warning about this new glitch. I'm going to brace myself for the inevitable mortifying embarrassment that comes with.

...OH! Before I go though. What was that pendant that he took from you?

[hellspawnedhero]

A memento from our mother. You get both of 'em and you can unlock the gate to the underworld.

I forget, is he wearing that pendant currently?

[badluckbabe]

...and your mother thought this was a good idea why?

He's wearing it combined with Vergil's half.

[hellspawnedhero]

Wasn't her idea. According to the legends, it was a gift from demons to humans. I'm guessin' she split it to make sure nobody could actually use it.

Thank you~

[badluckbabe]

And I notice you have both pieces now.

[hellspawnedhero]

Yeah...shit happened.

[badluckbabe]

That's rough.

[Because really, what else can you say to this sort of thing?]

[hellspawnedhero]

Ain't it always...

*Better than asking for details.*

[badluckbabe]

Maybe take the day off from...whatever it is you do huh?