Mission 4: Repeat performances (Early morning, at the start of Dante's trip.)

[hellspawnedhero]

*This post is brought to you from the road to Veridian City Milleniummon's castle. At first it's nothing but the dark red and black of the inside of Dante's coat pocket, along with the sounds of footsteps and shifting cloth. That lasts only a few seconds before the feed cuts to another set of memories. It shuts off with Dante none the wiser that his D-T was even on.*

(The first video has extreme violence and death and the second blatant but non-explicit sexual themes.)

Comments

[fullofthorns]

[ Really Dante? ]

Hey, you overgrown, show-boating tit. Your brain runs like a leaky faucet, you know that? I'm gonna know your whole life story before too long.

The only benefit is that you have an extraordinary eye for detail in recall and give me loads of eye-candy.

You should try thinking about bunnies and puppies, man, because people are gonna know all your business before the week is out.

Honestly, you left to go on a mission. Get your ass in the game.

[hellspawnedhero]

...Shit. Startin' to wonder if this glitch's just out to make me look like the big bad wolf.

Trust me, you ain't even seen half of the shit I've been through.

And I got a ways to go before I get to the castle, babe.

[fullofthorns]

You don't get to use babe, remember? I get to use babe. You don't.

And who was the kid? I'm trying to jigsaw your life here but with all the toads dangling sexy bitches and you looking like an idiot with the attaché from Hell I get distracted.

He's prettier than you...

[hellspawnedhero]

Ya said that about my identical twin, too.

...Pretty sure the kid's his son, actually.

[fullofthorns]

You have a nephew? Bet he's closer to my age. [ Lazy shark-grin. ]

And they are prettier than you. So are most women. That doesn't make me like them more. A man really ought to look like a man, sometimes.

Don't get me wrong, I'd take a swing at either one, but don't worry, you're still Ridiculously Good-Looking Guy. You're just ruggedly handsome and sexy instead of eye-searingly pretty.

Don't cry.

You'll look bad in front of your teamies.

[hellspawnedhero]

Who's cryin'? Just sayin' you might need your eyes checked.

And I can't be sure 'bout the nephew thing, but the kid's got my old man's blood, Verge's sword seems to like 'im and I'm pretty damn sure he ain't mine, so it's lookin' pretty likely.

[fullofthorns]

Iiiiii don't knoowww, Dante. Shit happens. You could have like...dozens of by-blows out there. You strike me as a casual and virile man and who knows how many chicks really wanted those little cotton-fluff head babies.

[hellspawnedhero]

And that would be why I ain't the sort to take chances. I go way outta my way to make sure I ain't gonna stick some clueless human chick with one'a those cotton-fluff babies that's gonna bring a bunch of demons sniffin' around for a chance to take a branch or two off the family tree.

[fullofthorns]

*smirk* Good to know.

So.

Fat frog angler fish demon.

Seems legit.

And you popped a priest. Dare I ask? I mean, innocent til proven guilty with me and all, but that was a pretty harsh vibe, Sexy.

[hellspawnedhero]

Fat frog angler fish dumpster stench demon.

*The smell was important, okay?*

And trust me, him bein' a priest don't mean shit. Guy was lookin' to open a hellgate right smack in the center of a city to lure demons into the human world so he could kill 'em.

[fullofthorns]

I simply cannot understand the motivations of others sometimes.

Also, do you even get a work-out doing what you do? You just do all your flips and shit and you don't seem the least bit winded. Must be nice.

[hellspawnedhero]

Religious whackos. The number one reason I don't mix well with churches. Even ones that worship a benevolent demon, apparently.

*He shrugs.*

And perks to bein' half demon. I can get tired, but you gotta be in my weight class to wear me out. My amphibious friend was barely even a warm up for the main event.

[fullofthorns]

Huh...I'll admit, I'm a little jealous. I've got enough demon blood through the generations to give me all kinds of perks in the long term, but there's some shit you just don't do alone, in the family business.

Dragons, for instance. Always a team effort.

[hellspawnedhero]

Don't be. Yeah, I kick a hell of a lot of ass, but I got exactly two people I can count on for backup if I manage to get in over my head. I gotta be the top of the food chain, or else I'm gonna get myself killed.

[fullofthorns]

True, true. I suppose in that I'm lucky. I don't know many personally, and a lot of them don't get along for all sorts of reasons, but the truth is, Guardians tend to work together fairly often over the years. And we're all pretty reliable by nature.

[hellspawnedhero]

Then I guess I know who to give a shout if I need a hand and Lady and Trish don't get their asses here in time.

[fullofthorns]

Honest truth. If we were around the same place, I'd show up and help you with anything, man. I'd be honored and delighted. [ She nods, givign him a thumbs up and a shark-smile. ]

[hellspawnedhero]

Anything, huh? I'll have to keep that in mind.

*He grins and gives a wink. Three guesses where his mind is.*

[Video]

[heyloser]

[There are a lot of questions someone could ask about this. Misfire's are of the utmost seriousness.]

Okay. First off? Way to make an entrance. Second, where were you when we fought the DJD? Seriously, you were awesome -- ! Except for when that guy kicked you in the face and when you got stabbed and stuff -- why'd he, uh, start straddling y -- y'know what, never mind.

Third, smooth moves there. [snrk]

And fourth, where do I get one of those?

[Someone's a teeny bit impressed with Pandora.]

[Video]

[hellspawnedhero]

*Oh for the love of...why do people keep making accusations about him and his relatives?*

If you got your legs free in a close up fight, ya use 'em. Kid was just showin' he knew how to handle a midair brawl.

And if you're talkin' about Pandora, ya don't. She's one of a kind.

[Video]

[heyloser]

Mmhmm. Alright. [Slight dubiousness to his voice. They sure has hell don't fight like that on Cybertron.]

Pandora? Nice name. But man, that sucks.

[Although knowing Misfire? He's probably end up accidentally leveling a city block.]

[Video]

[hellspawnedhero]

I usually ain't the guy saying to get your head out of the gutter, but he's a kid.

And it's probably for the best that there aren't more. Devil Arms like her ain't for beginners or untrustworthy types.

[Video]

[heyloser]

Eh, age is a relative thing when you're supposed to live forever. Unless you're goin' after sparks before they get a body, that's just wrong.

[Getting a bit too Cybertronian casual there, Misfire. He clears his throat and moves on.]

I'm trustworthy. Sorta. Although anyone who knows me would tell ya that weapons are kind of an iffy point.

[Video]

[hellspawnedhero]

Even part demons ain't ageless. 'Til a certain age, you're still a kid. Let 'em grow up before ya start eyein' 'em.

And nobody that isn't damn good with any kind of weapon they can think of gets to lay a finger on Pandora.

[Video]

[heyloser]

Okay! Geez. Sorry. Pardon me for callin' on something weird.

...Y'don't have to aim that thing yourself, do ya, 'cause maybe -- nah, nevermind, it's probably useless here, anyway.