[A video suddenly blips into life on the feed, and for a moment or two the only thing that can be seen is a weird, blurry grey mass. A muffled scratching can be heard over the microphone, like something being brushed across it before an even more muffled voice can be heard.]

You're holding it too close!

[The screen moves up sharply and gives everyone a nice, dizzying view of the sky (upside down, by the way) before righting itself, revealing a little girl sitting on a bench with a Digimon in her lap. He huffs and looks up at her, dropping his front legs over the one arm she has wrapped around him.]

I can hold it, I got it this time!

[The girl just shakes her head a little and adjusts her grip on the D-Terminal in her hand before flashing the screen a bright, braces filled grin. She seems to be wearing a bright pink sweater and looks perfectly comfortable in said sweater no matter what the temperature might currently be, with a pink headband, purple skirt, and black shoes to match.]

Dipper! Dipper are you out there? LOOK at what I've got!

[She squeezes Tapirmon a little, who lets out a faint squeak at her added affection. He was hoping his partner would be nice, but he NEVER expected she'd be this enthusiastic about the whole situation. Then again, was she really listening to what he said...?
In a world filled with talking animals, it's a wonder Mabel doesn't think this isn't just all a dream.]

He says his name's Tapirmon, but I was thinking I could give him a nickname, like...Aoshima~ Doesn't that sound adorable?

[Mabel looks down at Tapirmon who flicks his ears in response with a giggle.]

I 'unno, sounds pretty cool to me! Does that mean I get to give you a nickname too, Mabel?

[She ponders that for a moment, swinging her legs over the edge of the bench.]

We'll see! I gotta think of something first. I don't think ANYTHING'S gonna beat out Aoshima though.

[The feed opens up on the scene of a new Chosen, a chubby young albino boy looking quite dressed up with his blue suit and big white pompadour...
Being chased by his partner, PetitMamon. Gideon was already disoriented enough suddenly arriving here, followed by being excitedly blathered at by what seemed like some kind of talking stuffed animal, not really paying attention to said blathering. So when soon after he's approached by a flying demon, even a somewhat tiny and adorable one? Yeah, cue freaking out and running away in panic.
Problem is she's pretty persistent, but he promised himself no more working with demons. HE DOESN'T WANT ANY OF YOUR DEER TEETH.]

Monsieur Gideon, wait! You don't need to be afraid!

S-Stay back, demon!

[Gideon makes a cross with his fingers and holds it up in front of him as he edges away from the creature... who apparently speaks French, for some reason.]

But I am not a demon, I am a Digimon! Ees true I resemble one, but I promise, you have no reason to be scared of me! I am your partner, so s'il vous plaît Monsieur, if you would just listen--

YA WON'T TEMPT ME AGAIN!

[Clearly, they're off to an excellent start. So much for bonding over silly accents.]

 [The feed opens on a very distraught looking young man, running a hand through his awful, wrong hair. His new partner, a Kamemon, can be seen sitting behind him, arms crossed over its chest. They're already off to a bad start.]

So... mm, ok, I read the thing-

You skimmed it. [The two stare at each other between an awkward silence.]

-I read the thing, and I couldn't find anything about how to get back! I really, really, need to get back home, ok? 

[His Kamemon sighs and pushes his way into frame.] I've been trying to explain it to him! You're supposed to be here Milo, you were Chosen-

But I don't wanna be! I don't wanna be here, and I sure don't wanna be THIS again! And you seem really cool n' all, but I've already got a partner! Two of 'em! There's gotta be something I can do...

Milo, there isn't..

[He whimpers and tugs at his hair again.]

[Okay, he is really feeling weirded out right now and he wishes he could explain all this away, but for now it looked like he had to play along with what was going on. And what was going on was really super weird.

Right, do a call out for his brothers, find out if he is alone in this, maybe find out who is behind it? Did the Kraang find a way to stick him in a video game?]

Um... Hello? Leo, Raph, Donnie? Anyone around? It's Mikey.

Something really weird is going on. If this is a joke it isn't funny.

It's not a joke, didn't you pay any attention at all. You are a Chosen Child, you are my partner and here to help save both the digital world and the real world. Really, I thought my Chosen Child was a bit brighter than this.

Hey! I listened! I just... didn't think it was real. I still don't think it's real.

I heard that.

So? What do I care if you hear me... you... you...

What is your name?

I am Salamon, but since I'm not the only Salamon if you want you can give me a name to go by.

I get to name you?

Yes...?

I have to think on this, it needs to be a good name.

[The fact that something was going awry began when his D-terminal flicked on of it's own accord, showing the empty storage area of the Library. Magnus stopped what he was doing when he heard the sound of his own voice playing on the speaker.]

[It's wasn't entirely unexpected, but when he began to hear familiar words from Optimus - from a private conversation, he still began to attempt to turn it off. To say he quickly grew frustrated at the involuntary reveal would be an understatement. The communicator clacks to the surface of a book cart. His partner's voice pipes up:]

Uh - sir. Where are you going? You left your D-terminal!

[The memory continues to play from his point of view. It broadcasts a cave in, a lab built into the natural rock and stone, a fight with an unlikely partner, and the aftermath they barely survived.]

(skip to 12:50 ish for the scenes in question, unless you'd like to see the whole episode 8D; replies will be coming from his partner!)

[There's a slight pause at the beginning of the audio feed before a monotonous female voice starts talking.]

Identification: EarthConnect, Metals Department, Agent 06-02-F.

Seeking identification of currently assigned overseer. Reason for request: Chain of command is unknown to this agent.

Seeking assignment details. Reason for request: Mission parameters are unknown to this agent.

Seeking in-depth description of already preformed body modifications. Reason for Request: Self Care.

Seeking location. Reason for request: Surroundings unfamiliar, indigenous life appears sentient but is unfamiliar to this agent.

[There's a lengthy pause. The monotone doesn't break.]

Excuse me. If this network is human in nature, please disregard my previous requests. I would, however, like to ask for information on my situation.

Well, that was the weirdest introduction I've ever--

[The audio feed turns off.]

[The feed clicks on to show...oh great. What's Wheeljack up to? This time it looks like he actually wants to be seen on this thing, adjusting it to get it at the right angle. As usual, You is perched on his shoulder, where, surprisingly, he lets her stay this time. No shoving off. Although he could just be too preoccupied to care. But what could have his attention? Spoilers: it's food. He sits there, taking a bite into an apple.]

Okay, since no one's probably gonna address this, and I'm feelin' in a generous mood, I'm gonna let you in on the little secrets about this place, rookies.

You're all human.

[Well no shit, Wheeljack.]

Wanna know what this means?

[He looks at the apple for a second, as if surveying it for any damage.]

You have to refuel. Eat, I think you humans call it. Yannow, restock up on energy. And I mean it when I say -all the time-. [No that's just you, Wheeljack.]  If ya thought you could go weeks on one ration, think again. Ya won't last four days without another, so best accept that before ya learn it the hard way. Good news? Humans make some pretty decent scrap.

Wheeljack...isn't that your roommate's food?

They don't mind. I asked.

No you didn't!

[He ignores You from there on out, turning back to the screen and pinching a piece of his jacket, holding it towards the feed.]

These things. Clothes. They're required. Believe me, I tried to go without em. Apparently it's the equivalent of human armor. Except...yannow, useless. [There's another bite of apple, chewing it before tossing it up and down, as if wanting to occupy his hands with SOMETHING.]

You're also probably gonna get hurt or maimed if ya don't know what a battlefield's like.  Even then, put a bet on gettin' some battle scars. Creatures attack every few weeks so ya might want to look into training. Or a helmet.

[REASSURING.]

If you just let us handle things, you wouldn't get hurt as much, you stupid!

[Oh, that reminds him.]

And these things? [He tilts his head to the Gazimon] Don't become less annoying. Ever.

Neither do you but you don't see me complaining!

See what I mean?

[He finishes up that apple, standing up to go throw it away.]

That's all I got.

Sooooooo letmegetthisstraight: this is some kinda alternate universe that sucks people in, turns 'em human, throws weird organic creatures at them and tells them they need to save the world or whatever, and I'm "chosen" to be one of those poor saps?

[The Wormmon around his shoulders wiggles a bit and makes a surprised noise.]

I-in a sense... You were listening!

Ehhh, sorta, most of the rest of what you said kinda went in one audial and out the other -- EAR! In one ear and out the other. Human anatomy is really weird. Anyway! [Quickly, back to the comm with a broad, dumb grin and a sigh from Wormmon, who squeaks in surprise when Misfire gestures to her. He doesn't notice.] What's up, losers? The name's Misfire, and this lil' thing here is my partner, Crummy.

C-Crummy?!

So I'm not supposin' the names Krok, Crankcase, or Spinister are ringing any bells for anyone out there? No? 'Cos I know for sure Krok will throw a fit if he finds out I've disappeared, and I'd rather not end up facing whatever corporal wrath he'll come up with -- although last time, he just took me off syphoning duty, which sucked but wasn't unbearable, y'know? Oh! But that's nothing compared to that one time --

Um, Misfire?

[Crummy's attempts to interrupt Misfire go unnoticed, and he continues babbling on happily. Crummy looks at the communicator with an apologetic look, and manages to hit "mute" without Misfire noticing. Enjoy the whole three minutes of Misfire just... talking, only with no audio.]